Date me! (Sara's doc)

Hi, I'm Sara

33, straight, recently moved to SF from Brooklyn. Software engineer at a mid-stage startup (we make developer tools - it's more interesting than it sounds). I'm 5'2", I wear too many colors, and I was definitely a cat in a previous life - one of those weirdo bodega ones that actually likes people.

Why I'm here instead of on the apps

I've been on Hinge for two years and I'm exhausted. Every conversation dies after three messages. Nobody seems to want anything real. I deleted everything last month and decided to try something different.

I want someone who's willing to be earnest. Who reads. Who has opinions about things and isn't embarrassed about caring. The apps optimize for volume and I want the opposite of that.

A typical week in my life

Monday through Friday I'm working, usually from home but sometimes from a coffee shop in the Mission when I need a change of scenery. I'm a morning person - up at 6:30, run (slowly) around the park, shower, desk by 8.

Evenings I'm usually cooking something. I learned to cook from my grandmother and it's my main way of unwinding. I'll spend an hour on a random Wednesday making hand-pulled noodles because I watched a video that made it look easy (it wasn't). I make a different elaborate soup every Sunday.

Weekends: farmer's market Saturday morning, usually seeing friends for dinner or brunch. I run a half marathon about twice a year (slowly - I'm not competitive about it, I just like the structure of training for something).

What I'm good at

• Cooking (genuinely - this is not a "I can make pasta" situation)
• Remembering small things you tell me and surprising you with them later
• Making people feel comfortable and heard
• Planning trips with just the right amount of structure
• Being a calm presence when things are stressful

What I'm not good at

• Confrontation (working on it in therapy)
• Knowing when to stop working
• Keeping plants alive (I've accepted this about myself)
• Pretending to like things I don't like

Dealbreakers

These are genuine non-starters, not preferences:

• Not wanting kids eventually (I do, within the next 5-ish years)
• Smoking
• Not reading books (I don't care what genre, just that you read)

What to say if you reach out

Tell me about the last meal you cooked that you were proud of. Or the last book you couldn't put down. Or just tell me what your Sundays look like. I want to know what your actual life is like, not your highlight reel.